BBC Radio 4 Woman’s Hour interview: Why clear agreements, good records and early conversations matter

In an interview on BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour, Willans’ partner Laura Stone spoke to Claire O’Donnell about the case of Bernadette Rogers.

Bernadette was awarded £127,500 for providing 850 days of care for her mother and was acquitted of theft and fraud charges after taking £100,000 as payment for that care. Her experience highlighted the difficulties that can arise when families rely on informal arrangements.

Here, Laura explains the issues to consider when a family member steps in to care for an elderly relative. While questions about payment can be difficult to raise, leaving arrangements unclear can lead to disputes, financial strain and lasting damage to family relationships. This Q&A is adapted from the interview, with questions and answers edited for clarity. To listen to the interview in full, click play on the image above.

Why is this case important for families arranging care?

Bernadette’s case reflects a challenge that many families are increasingly facing: the rising cost of care. People are looking at whether living with a family member could provide the support they need and that raises important questions, such as how much care can that family member provide? What impact will it have on their own life? And how will they be compensated? These are conversations families need to have, rather than leaving expectations unspoken.

Can a verbal agreement about payment be proved?

It can be very difficult. In this case, witness evidence helped establish Sheila’s intention that her daughter should be properly paid. But relying on oral evidence is not something I would recommend to other families.

Without a written agreement, evidence such as care records and expenses can help demonstrate what happened. Witness evidence may also be important, but much can depend on the credibility of those witnesses. Putting arrangements in writing helps avoid that uncertainty.

What are the risks of taking money if you believe you are owed payment?

Even if you believe you have a valid claim for care you have provided, you need to go through the proper channels.

Where someone has left a will appointing executors, those executors are responsible for administering the estate and paying its liabilities. A claim for care fees may be only one liability; there may also be taxes and other payments to address. Those liabilities need to be dealt with in the appropriate order, which is why believing you are entitled to payment is not a reason to take matters into your own hands.

What should families do when payment is expected?

Do not rely solely on well-intentioned conversations around the kitchen table. If a relative has the capacity to explain that they want a family carer to be paid, getting tailored legal advice can help ensure their wishes are given legal effect.

The aim is to make arrangements clear and reduce the risk of lengthy litigation, which can be both costly and emotionally draining for the whole family.

What could a written care agreement cover?

A written care agreement could set out how much care will be provided and the daily rate. It should make clear what the payment is intended to cover.

For example, is it payment for providing care, or reimbursement of out-of-pocket expenses such as utilities, food, bed and board? Those are different things, and it is important that everyone understands the arrangement.

Are there other ways to recognise a family member’s care?

No one knows exactly when they will need care or how long they will need it for. Some people may feel more comfortable recognising that care through a specific gift in their will, or by leaving the carer a larger share of their estate than other family members.

There are different ways to record someone’s wishes, and advice should reflect their individual circumstances.

How can families reduce the risk of a disagreement later?

Good record keeping is important, including records of the care being provided. Above all, there needs to be clarity about the wishes of the person receiving care and how they want it to be paid for.

Transparency also matters. If everyone in the family knows what the arrangement is, it is more difficult for it to be challenged later. Having those conversations openly can help prevent misunderstandings.

What about the impact on a carer’s earnings and pension?

Getting the right advice is important. With an informal family arrangement, issues such as National Insurance and pension contributions may not have been addressed, so they need to be part of the discussion.

It is also important to distinguish between paying someone for their care and simply covering their expenses. A meeting with a legal adviser can be a springboard for conversations about matters the family may not yet have considered.

Why is it important to start these conversations early?

Families can look very different from previous generations, with blended families, second marriages and couples who choose to live together rather than marry. Alongside longer lives and increasing care costs, that creates a lot to think about. Who is likely to provide care? How will that affect them? And how should it be reflected in the eventual distribution of an estate?

People sometimes put these conversations off because they feel uncomfortable or morbid. But thinking ahead and getting affairs in order gives families a better chance of avoiding the emotional stress and financial consequences of a dispute later.

If you’re navigating family care arrangements and would like to update your will or would like guidance on planning your estate, please get in touch with our team of experts.

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